Blessed

I am having overwhelming feelings of joy today and feeling incredibly blessed!  I have written about how blessed I am many times over the last nine months since I started this blog.  I have been on a journey of transformation that began on July 1, 2013 when my second marriage fell apart.  I would not have made it through without GOD or my amazing friends and support system.  I was so depressed last summer and I found myself starting my life over once again.  At the time I was devastated but looking back I realize it was a process I needed to go through to find myself again.  I started feeling better after my trip to Japan in August and I have been on an upward spiral ever since.  It has been a day to day process of healing and gaining control again.  I was not ME and I did not like the person I had become.  Today I am feeling like the “old Stacey”…I am smiling and laughing and having fun.

I have NOT been looking for a man or interested in beginning a relationship anytime soon.  I have repeatedly told my friends that if I met someone and pursued a relationship it would have to be with someone VERY VERY special because I am just at the point in my life now where I cannot handle anymore heartbreak or pain.  I would rather be alone.  I have prayed a lot about it and I have left it up to GOD.  And out of the blue an amazing man has come into my life.  As many of you know, Kurt Serpe read my blog and asked me to help him write his life story.  I agreed and have been doing so since February.  Along the way we have found a very deep connection and there is no other explanation except that he has been sent to me by GOD…he is like an angel and he is TRULY a special person.  He has been misunderstood by some people because he has ADHD but I understand it and that is what matters.  I am just SO blessed that we have connected and I am looking forward to our adventure together.    I deeply appreciate everyone who has reached out and supported me over the last nine months of my healing process. I also appreciate everyone who has contacted me more recently with concern about my new blossoming relationship with Kurt.  He has been misunderstood, as I mentioned, by some of my closest friends and it really is a shame.  That is their loss. I’ve learned that friends will be judgmental and jealous of your happiness when they are unhappy with themselves.

I do not have many material things in my life anymore and that is OK.  I am not rich.  I live paycheck to paycheck like most people.  But I am happier right now than I have ever been in my entire  life because I know who I am again and I know what I want and don’t want.  My eyes are wide open and my heart is full again.  I have been stripped of all of the bitterness and depression and I AM HAPPY WITH ME!!! It is an amazing feeling to smile again and look forward to the future.  But more importantly to LIVE today.  This is it.  There is no dress rehearsal.  Life is happening right NOW.  It is not something we put off in the distance.  I have found a passion again for writing (travel articles, blogging, biographies!) and I have found a passion for inspiring others (via Twitter).  I continue to visit my dad once a week at the nursing home and I look forward to seeing him so much.  He is my true hero!  I have my 2 cats who love me.  I have a good job, a car, a roof over my head, food to eat, a church that I LOVE, amazing supportive friends and sooooooo much more.  Life is good.  Everyday is a blessing.  It is so good to be alive 🙂

Update to this post: Kurt and I have decided to pursue a professional relationship only at this time. We are still friends and I wish him the best! 🙂