“Perhaps when you thought you weren’t good enough, the truth was that you were overqualified.”
I am still in training at my new job and I am enjoying learning some new things. My co-worker who is training me noticed yesterday that the girl I replaced (who moved away) left her nameplate on her desk. My co-worker said “Oh no, she forgot to take her nameplate!”
My response?
“I don’t even have a nameplate.”
The girl who left her nameplate behind was a temporary employee, like me. I never noticed but just assumed that the “temp” workers didn’t have nameplates on their desks or offices. But I looked around and they ALL do, except me. When I told my co-worker that I didn’t have one she thought that was strange and said that it shouldn’t be a problem getting me one. I told her I didn’t need it.
I have felt over looked my entire life. I’ve always been a shy quiet girl, now woman, who doesn’t appear to have much to say but is shouting on the inside. I am growing out of my shell, as I am getting older. That insecure victim inside (that I despise) is losing her insecurities. But mainly I am growing out of my shell as I am growing closer to God. Knowing who I am in Christ has totally transformed my life. And with the knowing…I made a commitment. And in order to fulfill it, I must share what I know with other people. I cannot just pack it all up and move to my secluded island just yet. (Although on many days that sounds incredibly tempting!).
The sermon at church this past Sunday spoke to me. The subject was love (the greatest thing) and committing to becoming great at it. I felt like my pastor was speaking directly to me when he said, “it is time to step out of your comfort zone.” I have been sitting at home in my PJ’s writing blogs and tweeting positivity to thousands of people around the globe for over 2 years but I am not really getting my hands dirty. It is one thing to write and tweet but another to do and act. I am getting there one day at a time. I want to actively love again.
And in the mean time I realize that I do not need accolades or praise from people for the things that I am doing. It doesn’t matter if they don’t know me and don’t understand my journey. It doesn’t matter if they talk about me behind my back or call me names. What matters is that I only think positive thoughts about myself and only speak positive words to myself and others. What matters is that I am ALIVE and I am consciously aware of how blessed I am. What matters is that I KNOW I am loved and I desire to share with others that they are loved too.
I know that I am good enough. And maybe I am over qualified for certain things. That job I didn’t get was not meant for me because I am here to do something greater. That guy I liked who wasn’t interested was not meant for me because he wouldn’t know how to handle a woman who loves God more than him. The fact that my desk doesn’t have my nameplate means nothing. It is waiting for someone else to sit there because I am meant to move on to something greater than what I am doing now. A job that only God could have planned for me.
Isaiah 43:1 “Fear not for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name you are mine.”
I AM His.
Hello my name is child of the One True King (if anyone asks 🙂 ).
Blessings,
Stacey ~ iamalive
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