“Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” ~ J.K. Rowling
I have been on this journey for a couple of years now. I had been fumbling through life making one mistake after the next and I finally reached rock bottom at 41 years old. Rock bottom doesn’t sound like a fun place to be. But sometimes it is necessary. It is actually a place of peace. There is nowhere to go but up. It is the place where God scoops you up and tells you everything is going to be okay….”trust Me.”
God was all I had. I had no choice but to trust Him and by doing so I became ALIVE again. My life was not over. My life was only BEGINNING!!!
So here I am, now what? What am I supposed to be doing with my life now? I have asked myself this question a million times (not trusting). And I have finally come to the conclusion that I am supposed to just keep moving onward day by day…each step leading me further down this winding new path…not looking back.
As I have been walking down this path, I have stumbled upon my purpose. It was no accident though. It was all planned for me even before I knew what was happening. God had a vision for me that I couldn’t see yet and I still do not fully see it because I am still becoming. He has had a vision for my life even before I was born! He has a purpose for EVERYTHING.
I rode my bike through my neighborhood yesterday afternoon. The path I take is about a 20-30-minute ride depending how fast I pedal. It gives me time to breathe in plenty of fresh air. It gives me time to clear my head from all the clutter I have accumulated in my brain throughout the day. As I ride, I wonder about the people who live in the houses as I pass by. What do they do for a living? Are they single or married? Do they have kids? Grandkids? Are they following their dreams? Do they have regrets? Are they happy? Are they miserable? Are they ALIVE?
I have always been a dreamer. And I finally understand how to be happy (it is a choice…and I do not always choose it). My current day job is not my calling in life. I am still single…and I like it that way for right now. I don’t believe I would be walking down this path in the same way I am if I had a partner. God is working the career and the relationship stuff out for me. I have never been a patient person…so the waiting is difficult!!! He is giving me heaping doses of patience right now. It is all part of the test.
I am rebuilding my life. And as I am climbing out of the rubble, with each step I am trusting God’s vision. I am becoming the woman God intended me to be. I am becoming, me.
God, thank You for the vision You have for my life. I trust You and I know Your plan for my life is greater than I can imagine. I pray that others who are lost and seeking purpose in their life realize that it is all in Your hands. We trust You completely and we know that You know what is best for us. Thank You for loving us the way You do. In Jesus name, Amen.
Blessings,
Stacey ~ iamalive
