This year has been a roller coaster ride for me. It began at my now ex-husbands New Year’s Eve concert at a church somewhere in Indiana. His band had played their final set (they had played another show at a different venue earlier in the evening) and we were eating chili in the church kitchen with his bandmates and their girlfriends and our 2 boys (my step sons) when the clock struck midnight. I think that’s a pretty good place to be to start a new year. 🙂 The next couple of months were full of traveling with the band to numerous cities including several trips to Chicago, Nashville and St. Louis.  We actually bought a TOUR BUS and a travel trailer and sold or donated most of our worldly possessions so that we could have a more simple life and flexibility to travel and for my husband to pursue his music career. I mainly  helped him with booking and capturing the concerts on video…as well as being his biggest fan.  It was an exciting life.  We moved into our home on wheels shortly after my 41st birthday in March. We even took a vacation to Puerto Rico.  It was definitely a fun and exciting time. But our living situation wasn’t exactly a well thought out plan to say the least. And that was when the wheels began to fall off the bus (so to speak) that was holding our marriage together. My husband left me on July 1st just 2 weeks after our 1st wedding anniversary. My two amazingly wonderful and talented step sons as well as my husband who I was supposed to grow old with were suddenly gone from my life.  My world came crashing down in an instant.
I’ve spent the second half of this year healing, reflecting, and learning to love myself again. I was in turmoil for a couple of months while my husband was living his life. It didn’t seem fair. But after 6 months I have accepted things for what they are…a crazy beautiful chapter in the book of my life has come to an end. It’s been a journey for sure. My faith in God and support from my best friends has carried me through. Â I’m more positive now than I’ve ever been in my entire life. It’s an amazing thing . I’m working out and eating better. I’ve recently started a new job at a great company that is only 1.5 miles from my house. I’ve reconnected with my best friend from childhood after 20 years apart which has been a complete blessing. I’ve built other amazing friendships as well. I’ve started this blog as a means to express myself. I continued to use my Twitter account…not to promote a band anymore but as an outlet for positivity and inspiring others. I’ve entered writing contests and have been published. I spent two weeks in Japan with my soul sister in August and that is when I started to get my “mojo” back. I realized my life was NOT over when I was on that trip. Â I did a lot of things alone during my healing process. I traveled to a couple of concerts to see my favorite artists including Dave Matthews Band and Jack Johnson. Â I went on hikes and day trips and just enjoyed being in nature. Â I went to the zoo several times because I love animals…they bring me joy and peace. My two cats and I moved in with an awesome roommate (who has 6 dogs and 2 cats!) and she also fosters homeless and pregnant dogs for the humane society. Â It has been such a fun experience living here and I appreciate her for the good work she does. I’ve spent more quality time with my dad than ever. Ive joined an awesome church that I look forward to going to every Sunday.
My list goes on and on. And I won’t stop. 2014 is going to be an amazing year! I can feel it in my bones. I’ve had people who supposedly loved me totally block me out of their lives and it proves who’s fake and who’s real and I’m glad to have learned those things!!! True colors definitely shine through when things get real and you really do learn who cares when you’re facing difficult times. Â But more importantly, I have learned so much about myself this year. I have learned to let go of insecurities and I have learned to love myself again. Â Out of the darkness comes light, always. You’ve just got to believe in yourself and keep moving forward. Never give up! Â I’m very blessed and I’m taking nothing for granted anymore. Life’s short but it’s beautiful and I plan to enjoy the second half to it’s fullest. I hope you all enjoy the journey with me. Â If you are reading this I thank you for your support…and I wish you much happiness in 2014. Â Have a blessed and Happy New Year!
Please watch my video below and follow my journey.
I AM ALIVE! Â 2013
(you might have to copy and paste the link to the video, thanks!)